To forgive or not forgive.

To forgive or not forgive…that is the question?

Is forgiveness necessary in every situation? What about if someone disrespects you, offends you, or hurts you? Is it justifiable to hold onto the anger, bitterness and resentment in your heart, especially if the action was intentional?

The word forgive is defined as 1-to stop feeling angry or resentful toward someone for (an offense, flaw or mistake) 2-to cancel a debt. While writing this blog I was convicted by the latter part of the definition lol, to cancel a debt, to basically release a person from having to earn my forgiveness. This is mind blowing. It reminds me of how the Father cancelled our debt and forgave our sins through the sacrifice of Jesus. The truth is we were guilty and He had a right to feel angry and resentful towards us. Yet, Jesus being the ultimate sacrifice allowed the Father to cancel a debt that we could never repay.

I can say it is easier for me to forgive people and that is only a result of me yielding to Holy Spirit living in me.Yet at times it’s a struggle because I feel justified in my anger and I want to hold on to it. It’s even more difficult when I replay the scenario over in my head a million times or I re-read the post or text messages until my anger is rekindled. When I first gave my life to the Lord back in 2002 (I backslid and rededicated my life) I equated forgiveness with reconciliation. Sometimes it is necessary and in other cases it is not. I have learned that in certain scenarios and in order to heal it is imperative that you separate yourself from people. You can truly forgive someone, release them in your heart and not associate with them. However, we must forgive. Matthew 6:14-15 “For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses”.

Now I am not advocating that you cut a everyone off you’ve ever had a disagreement with. Nevertheless, there are times when you must disconnect from people. We often ignore the Internal alarms that are ringing and going off inside of us and choose to give people “the benefit of the doubt”. Beloved (in my Iyanla Vanzant’s voice) pay attention to the signs !!! If you find yourself in a situation where you are not sure if you should reconcile or part ways with a person or people, pray about it. God will direct you. The reality is some people are not a part of the plan that God has for your life. It just is what it is. Some people are toxic, jealous and have ill intentions. Others are genuine and good natured but just not apart of the plan. If by the Holy Spirit you are being warned to disconnect from people and you blatantly ignore His dealings and stay connected you will suffer the consequences of your disobedience! No one and no-thang (nothing) is worth forfeiting your destiny for.

If we are honest we can admit that we have done or said things that have hurt and offended others. I know that I have not been the perfect friend, sister, auntie, mother, daughter, wife and so on. I know there are people that I have hurt and offended, some of which I am conscious of and some I am not aware of. I ask for forgiveness and I forgive because I need my sins and trespasses forgiven. I can be a trip at times 😂

My friends forgive so that you may be forgiven. Evaluate your relationships and determine which ones to hold on to and which ones to end, because your destiny depends on it. Ensure that you are not the toxic, jealous ill willed person in someone else’s life. If you are acknowledge it, ask for forgiveness, forgive yourself and ask the Father to help and change you. He can and will do it!!
Let’s be purposed minded, intentional in love, intentional in forgiveness, intentional in displaying the nature of Christ to a world with little hope…..till next week ❤️❤️❤️

Let’s pray
Father it is in the name of Jesus that we come before you. Father we ask for forgiveness. Forgive us Lord for the people we have hurt, intentionally and unintentionally, forgive us for hurting and disobeying you. Help us to be purposed in our love, empower us to love like you love. We ask you to remove every person from our lives that mean us harm and help us to recognize your warning signs and to not be so familiar with people that we cannot disconnect from them. Father, for those people who you remove and expose we pray for them. We pray for their well being, we pray and ask that you will deal with their heart and bring them to a place of repentance. We pray your protection over them. And Father we thank you for the divine connections that you are bringing in our life. Every strategic person that you will use to bring us one step closer to our destiny. We love you and give you praise in Jesus name amen.

Remember, forgive it is necessary and it is freeing ❤️❤️❤️